What is your best relationship advice?

To always have the highest good of the other be your guide. When the other is paramount this does not negate the self. On the contrary it is because of this, we as self, must endeavor to know the depths of our being. Not our self as ego, but our “self” that is complete and whole as we are. In order to do this the first word that comes to mind is courage. Courage. To have the courage to be your self. To be true. Through our bravery we can uncover and expose our vulnerabilities to our self. This is not done in a vacuum or to be completed before entering a relationship. It is the very nature of relationships to provide us with the friction we need to turn inward. To help us engage the places reflected to us by the other. When we engage with another, it is for the purpose of growth, connection and love.

Another will never complete us or even know what it is we need. If we hold the assumption they should, then we miss the opportunity for a growing bond. Out of our love for one another, we are given the chance to witness the unfolding of our hearts. This unfolding holds the depth of our love, compassion and mystery. Entering the mystery takes us down the path into the unknown. I believe it is here that we find our true love for the other. A distillation happens when we reside in the heart of true love. It is here that our love for another can remain, regardless of any unmet needs or foreseen challenges ahead. This can happen by our willingness to face the unknown. To continue to grow and discover that we are always changing-even (especially) in those we think we know the best. If we can allow the questioning and curiosity of the other, we are given the opportunity to reach deeper in ourselves. This allows the space for uncertainty to flourish. If we are rooted here, our fears diminish and our trust will deepen. Through this understanding our heart remains steadfast in our love. A love that always continues regardless of outcomes or expectations. The search for the heart of true love resides in us always. And it is this gift of love that we bring to the other.